Teen Emotions & Mental Health: What Can Adults Do During Difficult Moments?

When teens are struggling to manage their emotions, a few practical strategies can help adults respond supportively.

Key Points

Dr. Courtney Tucker offers guidance on how adults can best navigate challenging moments to help young people through distress
Detach from outcomes and leave space for their process by letting go of the urge to fix or control the situation to be calm and supportive.
Shifting to curiosity and asking questions without judgment can help open the conversation and identify what’s beneath the surface.
Validating their experience through compassion and empathy helps the young person to feel understood.
Physical safety and grounding can bring heightened emotions back to baseline before engaging in conversation.
"Name it to tame it" - Reflecting together on what happened builds language to identify better strategies for the future.

In honor of World Mental Health Day, we’re focusing on a key role in teen mental health, the adults in their lives. Dr. Courtney Tucker shares practical strategies for what adults can do when emotions run high and a young person is experiencing heightened distress.

When a young person becomes overwhelmed by strong emotions, whether through tears or anger, it can be difficult to know how to respond in the moment. Mental health affects young people everywhere. According to the 2025 Youth Health in Focus Report, findings indicate “1 in 3 high school students experienced persistent feelings of sadness or hopelessness.” Students with low resilience are struggling to grapple with their emotions, and adults are increasingly looking for ways to support them. As the conversation around mental health becomes normalized, youth can learn how to care for their mental health from the adults around them.

Detach from Outcomes

When a young person is in distress, big emotions make it hard to figure out what to do next. In moments of overwhelm, the brain’s stress response makes it difficult to think clearly, communicate, or control emotions.

When supporting youth in the middle of a stress response, adults need to detach from outcomes. Their job is not to fix the problem or win the power struggle (cleaning their room, screen time, or homework). Instead, the goal is to support teens through the difficult moment. By following these steps, adults can help teens to process emotions, return to calm, and think clearly again.

Stay Curious

When a teen is experiencing emotional distress, it can be hard for adults to stay calm and manage their own emotions. The default is to feed into the behavior by yelling back or jumping in to fix the problem. Staying curious opens new pathways for conversation and for the young person’s voice to be heard. The teen has an opportunity to make a new choice.

Adults can ask questions like, “When did this start for you?” or “How can I help you slow this down?”

Validate

Validation builds trust and strengthens the relationship between the adult and young person over time. The number one thing is validating that it's OK for them. Acknowledge what a teen is experiencing with “That sounds really hard.” Share empathy by saying, “I can see this really bothers you,” rather than responding with comments that shame or blame. When a teen feels heard and understood, they are more likely to problem-solve together. By validating, adults can begin to foster communication about what happened.

Calm

When trying to help teens, creating a sense of physical safety for teens can be overlooked. When teens are flooded with emotions, they may not be able to problem-solve or utilize skills to cope until their physical body feels safe and under control. Adults can help by eliminating the physical distress. Once the body is safe, the brain can think more clearly and respond. Consider: providing children a quiet space, a sensory walk, rocking in a rocking chair, or playing with a fidget.

Naming

Often called “Name it, Tame It,” being able to reflect on and understand what happened supports teens in developing language to identify the emotions behind why they were upset by a disagreement with a friend or angry with a sibling. Adults can prompt teens by asking, “Can you name and describe what just happened?” By reflecting on what happened, the adult can help the teen brainstorm emerging solutions, develop tools, and build strategies so emotional overwhelm isn’t the default next time. Young people learn from the adults around them. When trusted adults model healthy strategies to respond to stress, they can help teens do the same in difficult moments.

For schools interested in deeper learning opportunities to support students, learn more about bryt's trauma-informed, healing-centered approach at brooklinecenter.org/bryt.

About Dr. Courtney Tucker

Dr. Courtney Tucker is the Strategic Director at brytInsight, bryt’s Professional Learning and Consultation team. She holds a PhD from Emory University and an MSW from Smith College School for Social Work. A chemist turned clinician, Dr. Tucker has remained dedicated to serving in the areas of teaching, mentoring, training, and clinical services for the past 20-plus years. In addition to her current responsibilities leading professional learning for bryt, she is an adjunct professor in social work, collegiate counselor, private practice clinician, coach, and mental health consultant.

About bryt

General Info: A leader in school-based mental health support, bryt (pronounced “bright”) transforms how schools support students who have experienced a mental health disruption. Utilizing a tier-3 mental health support model, bryt supports schools in strengthening in-school supports to help students successfully transition back to school

Students across seven states in nearly 250 schools have access to a bryt program
In 2020, the bryt Team began providing professional development and consultation to educators about school mental health systems (in addition to supporting the bryt Tier 3 intervention).
Over the past five years, bryt has trained staff from more than 200 districts in school-based mental health best practices.